Speaker 1: 0:00

This episode is sponsored by Kathy L Wall, state Farm Agency Learn more at kathylwallcom and Stuart Arango, oral Surgery Learn more at saoralsurgeonscom. Welcome to the Bub Lounge. I'm Martha Jackson, and joining me today is Chloe Walsh, who is working with us this summer as our assistant producer, and she's also our guest today. Welcome to the show, chloe. Thank you so much. I'm so excited to be here.

Speaker 1: 0:31

So today we're talking about sorority recruitment. Everyone that I know because we just had seniors that graduate have daughters that are preparing for it and they're getting their outfits together and getting their recs and their letters together and everything outfits together and getting their recs and the letters together and everything. And Chloe just completed her first year at the University of Texas and went through all this one year ago, so she's going to tell us all about her experience.

Speaker 2: 0:52

I'm so excited today I'm credible to speak to you all about this because I had a perfect rush, meaning that each day I was invited to go back to the maximum number of houses, and I'm super excited to talk about it. I know it's a huge. People look at it as stressful, but it's really something to be excited about and have great conversation with girls and I can't wait to get into it with y'all.

Speaker 1: 1:13

Well, I always say it's kind of like dating it's a mutual back and forth. If it's the right fit, you just know in your heart. If it's not, it's okay, just move on.

Speaker 2: 1:26

No loss, just it's so important to find that place where you feel good about yourself. Right, absolutely okay, so let's just get into it. I know what y'all are stressing about the most is outfits, and the best advice I can give y'all is to start shopping now, because I remember I waited to get my outfits altered and I needed to get them altered for the week, and some great places are Anna's Alterations. Also, unique Tailors are some great places. So, yeah, I think I'm going to go through the day-by-day breakdown about outfits. So I'm going to preface it with I am at the University of Texas and I'm a Pi Beta Phi there, so my experience will mainly be from Texas.

Speaker 2: 2:03

First day is open house and opening convocation day. This day was a day that we wore workout clothes and you don't see any of the houses, so no sorority girls see you at all, and the rogams, or the girls who disassociate from their sororities, are basically your guide throughout the week. They're helping you like deal with the app that they give you to make when you when, eventually, you have to make the cuts for the houses, and so these are called the rogams um, let me ask a quick question, because I mean, it was a very long time ago that I went through rush myself that we didn't have those first two days, like we actually went to the houses.

Speaker 1: 2:38

How are you taking a look at them? Is it on video? You, they so?

Speaker 2: 2:43

they, the programs walk. You take you on a walking tour of each house. So definitely wear comfortable shoes. Girls wore like hokas or their nike running shoes. Um, and then you will go back to. It was called the utc, which is the teaching center at texas, and we watched 13 videos of the 13 different sororities and the videos were just the sorority girls giving an intro like hey, this is our sorority, this is our philanthropy, like blah blah.

Speaker 2: 3:13

So then, after that, you make your first round of cuts and that's on open house day. The next two days are philanthropy days. These are the days the first time you get to go to the house. Depending on the college, if there are more sororities, you might have three philanthropy two days are philanthropy days. These are the days the first time you get to go to the house. Depending on the college, if there are more sororities, you might have three philanthropy days. Like I know, alabama had three but Texas only had two. So you could have like X amount of houses on the first day and then, like majority of your house is the second day or vice versa. It just depends that first philanthropy day year I wore the t-shirt texas gave us. It said like texas panhellenic on it. Super cute, um, but I wore a white lululemon athletic skirt, and then that was the first day, and then the second day, and then I I aired out that t-shirt the first day because you're, it's hot yeah, I sprayed it with perfume.

Speaker 2: 4:05

But the second day I wore like a cuter skirt that I got from Baldwin Bread and it was like a skirt in the front and shorts in the back. But a bunch of girls wore like Revolve white bottoms or different brands. So those are for the philanthropy days. Okay. Moving on is sisterhood. So this was my personally my favorite round of rush, just because, um, the energy is like super high. It's like the first day that you get to wear a dress. So this dress can be um cocktail length and it's usually no like try not to show any um cutouts or like super, super tight. It's really just more of a cute, bright, colored sundress, and I linked in the blog post A bunch of Cute inspirations for these dresses, anything like super bright, colorful, flowy.

Speaker 2: 4:56

For sisterhood round and For Texas, we were narrowed down to six Because after your two days of philanthropy you make a cut. So then the houses, if they want you back, you will go to those. For sisterhood it's usually a shorter day but longer conversations at sisterhood, okay. And then for sisterhood I also wore like comfortable, cute tennis shoes. Then after sisterhood you make your cut down to two for prep night. Prep night is more of an emotional night. How do you make your cut down to two for prep night? Prep night is more of an emotional night. I wore a black dress for prep night but depending on your college, some colleges, they'll tell you, will be colorful dresses, but Texas we wore black dresses with heels and I'm going to get into it later. But for your bag that Texas gives you that you carry from house to house, I put flip-flops in my bag because heels I was not about to walk.

Speaker 1: 5:49

Austin in heels, you cannot walk around in those.

Speaker 2: 5:53

So yeah, that's kind of an overrun on the outfits for each day. And then bid day is wear your favorite favorite dress because you're going to get a million photos in it that you will frame and put in your dorm Super bright, colorful, sundress, kind of like sisterhood, but I would do the dress you like more on bit day. And then those were comfortable tennis shoes like cute sneakers because you're running to the house from the UTC.

Speaker 1: 6:18

Well, a lot has changed since my day. I mean, that's very interesting to hear how it's changed, because we were in person all day, every day. And that crazy energy that you're talking about when they're singing, clapping and lining up in rows. That went on every day that we went. It was rather overwhelming.

Speaker 2: 6:35

I know you kind of have to adjust your eardrums.

Speaker 1: 6:37

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Speaker 2: 7:44

Okay, yeah. So jewelry is such a fun aspect of rush because the first philanthropy days you're wearing a t-shirt, so jewelry is really the only way that you can show your personality. Um, one of my favorite accessories I wore was a necklace from Jenny Baker designs that had my name on it and it was white letters and like pearl and I thought it was so smart because you're not just meeting the sorority girls in the house, but you are walking around Austin with all of the other rushies and it's such a fun way to meet people. A lot of girls are like too caught up in oh my gosh, what am I going to talk about in the sorority house when really you could be making friends like outside of the sorority house, just walking around, and having that my name on my necklace I think helps some girls who totally didn't remember my name be like yeah, um, so that was a fun way.

Speaker 2: 8:36

Also, I went with like more just simple um studs for my earrings, because sometimes you're running from house to house and if you have big swinging earrings it can be kind of a hassle, kind of weigh you down right um. That makes sense, just like fun bracelets. Um gemma collection is one of my favorite jewelry stores. It's in steiner plaza and then, like I said earlier, jenny baker designs is great jewelry for rush perfect.

Speaker 1: 9:00

Well, I know a lot of people get really stressed. They don't know what to talk about, and I just remember grinding my teeth so badly that my jaws just like hurt so bad by the time bid day came up. But you actually have some really good tips on how to enjoy it about the conversations because it's all in the sorority girl.

Speaker 2: 9:25

They know what they're supposed to talk about with you and if it ever gets awkward this is my favorite trick at all I would just ask them, like, where are your favorite study spots on campus? Or what are some great restaurants here, or what are some like, who was your favorite professor this year? I think that's such a great way to like, um, move the conversation along and if it's being awkward, totally like, get a benefit out of it. I mean, you're there, you might as well find out good classes to take or great clubs to join or great study spots on campus, and that it shows the sorority girl that you're interested in what she thinks.

Speaker 1: 10:04

Sure, sure. Well, on the flip side, is there anything that you would say you should avoid? As far as topics go, yes, avoid.

Speaker 2: 10:12

It was like call the three Bs. It was like boys, booze and bars.

Speaker 1: 10:17

Yeah, yes, ma'am.

Speaker 2: 10:19

Yeah, avoid those conversations, but they're not brought up by the sorority girl, and if they are, that's typically a red flag.

Speaker 1: 10:28

Maybe that's not the best place.

Speaker 2: 10:30

Right yeah, avoid the three Bs.

Speaker 1: 10:33

Sounds good. Chloe, these are all really really great tips, and I just want to talk about, like kind of the other side. Like, for example, you had a perfect rush, but not everyone gets that opportunity, and just how do the girls handle disappointment, because a lot of times they will feel like a place was a good fit for them and then maybe they get cut and they feel that devastation. But do you have any recommendations for anyone that's going through that? Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 2: 11:00

If you get cut from a sorority, it's not on you at all, it's more. Just maybe it wasn't the right fit and at the end of the day, you're going to have friends in every sorority. Every sorority is a great sorority. You can't make a mistake. And also one of my favorite quotes is instead of stressing about something, be grateful for it.

Speaker 2: 11:21

And if you really make your mindset that going in like, instead of oh no, all these houses, whatever get cut like, just be grateful that you get to Rush and that at the end of the day, you're going to end up with a great house of girls and you're going to have connections for life and just girls who love you and you can love on them and have a support system. In my freshman dorm, there were four different sororities represented on my floor and I loved each and every one of them, and so at the end of the day, I just think be grateful for the opportunity to rush and if it doesn't work out, let's ponder on it for two minutes and then wipe it clear of our head and put a smile on our face and just be happy that we're there and just trust that you got cut by a house and it was meant to be, and you will end up where you're supposed to be.

Speaker 1: 12:07

Right. Well, it kind of goes back to that dating thing that I always like to refer back to is, if it's not a mutual fit, you know you're not going to be happy, so you have to want them as much as they want you to find that, that perfect home. I guess, Right, Absolutely. Finding an oral surgeon is hard enough for yourself, and when it comes to your kids it can feel impossible. We suggest our friends at Stuart and Orango because, from emergencies to wisdom teeth and everything in between, they have you covered.

Speaker 1: 12:34

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Speaker 1: 13:14

That's saoralsurgeonscom, so we're all thinking about what to put in our little bag our emergency kit the little things that we can carry with us while we're walking around, and most places are pretty hot during this time of year, so tell us what you recommend us take along.

Speaker 2: 13:31

Okay, here is what I recommended to put in my bag. Also, a bunch of these are linked on the blog post. So, first things first, a mini fan. I know in Austin it gets so hot, and so having a mini fan is super key. A portable charger as well. A mini brush perfume. Um, comfy shoes I'm touched on this earlier when I was talking about prep night, but comfy shoes to walk in between houses. Um, so I had a pair of flip-flops that I could just pop on after I left a house. Um, breath mints is a great idea.

Speaker 2: 14:04

You're having lots of conversations with lots of girls, your mouth gets very dry. And also there's water outside of. I just thought about this there's water outside of. There should be water outside of all of the sorority houses.

Speaker 1: 14:16

Okay, good, I was going to say, should we have a bottle of water too?

Speaker 2: 14:20

Yeah, that takes up a bunch of space in the bag. Sure, yeah, that takes up a bunch of space in the bag, so don't stress about that. Mini spray deodorant is a great idea. And then makeup wise, I did a mini powder and brush because you think you have more time, like if I were to say to bring makeup, it would bring. It would be powder, because you don't have as much time as you think to go into the house like to get ready. And then, last thing is oil blotting sheets. I get super oily and so this was you can get them at cvs. They're a lifesaver, that is such. So, yeah, that's what I have in the bag well, perfect.

Speaker 1: 14:53

Well, chloe has put together a blog post that'll be on bubble loungenet and I'll link it in the show notes, but she's included some really great information. She's just kind of expanded our conversation here with lots of resources for you all. I want to go back to conversations, because that's one of the main things that I hear. A lot of the girls that are about to go through Rush say that they just they're nervous. They don't know what to talk about. You're a very confident person, you're very easy to talk to, but a lot of girls get nervous and they kind of clam up. Do you have any tips of how they can kind of mentally prepare what they would like to say to in order to present their best selves?

Speaker 2: 15:31

I would say definitely, just think about what you want to put forward before you're walking into the house. You do have a lot of time, like when you're lined up before the doors open, to just sit there and think, and I think that they really just want to see you and just see your most authentic self. So I wouldn't don't think about what you think the sorority wants to hear, sure, I would just really focus on telling your own story and um, and if it's a right fit for that house, the conversation, conversation should feel natural.

Speaker 2: 16:04

And it should feel like you're supposed to be there Exactly and that you're wanted. And if it feels like it's fake, almost if the conversation feels like you're talking but you're not saying anything.

Speaker 1: 16:15

Fake or forced.

Speaker 2: 16:16

Right, I don't think that's the right fit, and Rush is all about. You know, where does your heart want to go? Not about what your mom went or what, um, you know like it should all just feel supernatural, sure?

Speaker 1: 16:30

well, we've interviewed shay sides several times before, and one of the things that we joked about in our last interview was it would be really cool if they could just take the letters off the house, right, it was like a blind test, like you had no idea yeah, I think that that would make a huge difference, because we all get caught up, I would almost say brand names, like you hear, these top houses and, and you're you kind of get hung up on I have to be right in that one instead of that one, whereas it might not actually be the right fit for you.

Speaker 2: 16:59

I'm glad you brought that up because I was seeing the other day top houses. What girls consider as a top house is so, um, it's all based on your perspective of, like, okay, out of state, girls are going to have different view of what's a top house, and in state girls are super tiny towns are going to have a different view on what's a top house. And also you just kind of have to decide for yourself, like, okay, are the kindest girls going to be the top house? Or, like, the prettiest girls, or what the boys are saying is the top house? You kind of just have to decide for yourself.

Speaker 2: 17:39

Okay, boys are saying is the top house? You kind of just have to decide for yourself. Okay, I want to be a part, like for me, I want I joined pi fi because I have the utmost respect for the girls in the grade above me and the grade above them and the seniors who just graduated. And for me, in my mind, pi fi was the top house because those were the girls that I respected and wanted to be like and were the kindness in my well, that's so good that you, that you were able to know so many people ahead of time.

Speaker 1: 17:57

That makes such a difference, like when I went to OU, I only knew like one or two other people and I ended up going to the sorority.

Speaker 1: 18:04

That I wanted and I was very happy about that. But that's really neat that you knew so many, because that makes such a difference. And just kind of tying in with that, I've heard that the way, uh, everyone gets to know each other now is pretty much on instagram, that everyone follows each other and that way you can kind of get a feel of what everyone's like and it's funny you said that because going into college it's like me and my friends talked about.

Speaker 2: 18:30

You follow each other on Instagram, like you see the UT 27 on Instagram and you're like the best way to meet people and like that first week when Rush hasn't started and you're just in Austin, is being like up front and being like oh my gosh, I follow you Like we don't really know each other yet, but it's so nice to meet you and just being vulnerable and just not putting up walls because at the end of the day, y'all both know you follow each other and you both know that you've seen each other's pictures Right.

Speaker 1: 19:00

Well, I would think that would be a good conversation starter, because if you went to Greece this summer, you could talk about that Absolutely.

Speaker 1: 19:07

Yeah, you can kind of get a peek into what they were up to and talk about that. I think that's awesome, absolutely. Peek into what they were up to and talk about that I think that's awesome, absolutely. One thing that I remember when I went through Rush and I was on the other side is that there's a very intense process as far as matching up somebody that was a current member with a prospective new member, and the way that the lines matched up and you got synchronized with someone that you had something in common with and I was just curious, do they still do that?

Speaker 2: 19:35

Yes, so I'm glad you brought that up.

Speaker 2: 19:37

So the person that you're going to talk to in the house so PNMs are potential new members and then current members are obviously the current members in the house.

Speaker 2: 19:45

And so when you're walking in they're not just going to put you with your best like, for example, they wouldn't just put me with my best highland park older friend on the first and the very beginning of rush, because I already know them. They want to show off their other members of the sorority so you can really get a feel for the whole pledge class above you. So there's a whole process like behind the scenes for the current members and they will say you're on student council for, like a Westlake school. Then they're gonna put you with a PNM who was on student council at Highland Park. So you will have something to talk about or there will be something in common. Like you both were on a drill team together, both were on the soccer team at different schools, or so you will have something in common with the girl that you're talking to which should ease the pressure of oh my gosh, I don't know what I'm going to talk about. Like we have nothing. I don't even know this person, but it should flow up really naturally.

Speaker 1: 20:42

Well, I've heard kind of mixed information. As far as you know, I've written a lot of recs and letters this summer and some people say, oh, the girls don't even read that. It's just more of a formality of something that you need to do is to have that rec and the letter and the photos and everything to go in. But how closely do the girls on your side look at all that information?

Speaker 2: 21:06

Well, I haven't been through that side yet. I'm going to start that in.

Speaker 1: 21:10

August. I know we're going to talk about that this time next year.

Speaker 2: 21:13

Oh, yeah, but it's definitely also I mean girls from highland park. Girls know you at texas especially, and like, if you have, if you know, like one person, like they'll say like you can trust that your older friend will be like oh my gosh, this is, this is Samantha. She's so cute, she does this, this and this in high school. She's awesome. And so there should be peace in knowing that older girls are telling their friends the positives about you and what to look forward about meeting you during Rush.

Speaker 1: 21:48

Well, it's really important to have an insider pulling for you right. Absolutely. That just really increases your chances of people getting to know you. It's almost like you're a politician and you have somebody on the inside that's like marketing you.

Speaker 2: 22:02

Right, right, it really is.

Speaker 1: 22:04

It's really important to have that, so you do need to be kind of working it and getting to know everyone.

Speaker 2: 22:11

it's on instagram or right in person and I'm glad you brought up instagram because also this summer is a good chance to have like clean up your instagram is basically the easiest way to say it. Um, I know girls from other schools who have gotten like cut from certain sororities because they had some risky things on their Instagram. So just make sure there's nothing too crazy out there.

Speaker 1: 22:33

So I've heard no red cups, no bikinis, anything else.

Speaker 2: 22:40

I think you covered it.

Speaker 1: 22:42

You can use your imagination Right Best judgment.

Speaker 2: 22:45

Right, clean up that Instagram.

Speaker 1: 22:47

What if you have a daughter that doesn't post very much on Instagram?

Speaker 2: 22:52

I would say I mean, it's only going to help you. If you're active on Instagram, then it's another chance for the sororities to see who you are, what you're doing this summer. That could be potential conversation starters for.

Speaker 1: 23:03

Rush, like we talked about earlier, right and also I was.

Speaker 2: 23:08

so I never knew if I was supposed to as a PNM over the summer last summer. I never knew if I was supposed to follow the sorority accounts on Instagram, and so the rule that I kind of went by was like either follow every sorority or no sorority, sure that makes sense and just kind of definitely look at the social medias to see kind of like who the girls are, what their vibe is. But bad idea to just follow one sorority or two stories or three sororities.

Speaker 1: 23:37

Well, along those lines I've kind of peeked on some of those stories just to see what it's like now oh my god, they're like, yeah, super models and they're in bikinis and they're like on boats and they just look so gorgeous like I almost find that kind of intimidating right.

Speaker 2: 23:52

You have to keep in mind, along with the social media, that just because, like a sorority, social media says this, like it, you just have to be careful of what's real and what's not, because there's definitely like it's definitely sometimes it can be a front or something. You just have to. That's why rush is so important, going in with a clear mindset, because you never know, like, what reality is and what's not. Sure, sure.

Speaker 1: 24:21

Well, what are some of your final points? Just to wrap things up, and what? What do you want to leave the?

Speaker 2: 24:25

listeners with. So my first final point is that most stress during rush comes from the girls in your dorm talking about it. Oh my gosh, the chitter, chatter, right, it can be so much. So just listen to your own heart and try to just drown out the noise. And, like, group girls like to make group chats during rush week or during those first few weeks. So just drown that out and just truly go with your gut well, it's almost like an athlete like you see at the olympics.

Speaker 1: 24:52

They're sitting in the corner by themselves with their earphones on listening to their music just trying to drown out the world you almost need to figure out your own version of that Absolutely.

Speaker 2: 25:00

And, along with that, no one knows you better than your mom. And so sometimes when it's when you want to isolate yourself and have your own thoughts, like it was nice during Rush to just talk to my mom and be like okay, like I don't really, I just want to debrief this and just your mom's like there to help you, but at the end of the day, it's your own decision. I mean, whenever our moms rushed, it was. Rush is so different than it was now, than it was 10, 20, 30 years ago, it really is yeah.

Speaker 1: 25:33

So yeah, that was my second point. You need to be really careful about talking among the girls saying, oh my gosh, I love Kappa the best, because that could potentially get back somehow right. So you need to be real careful about mentioning specifics.

Speaker 2: 25:45

Also freshman year, you're assigned rooms and I promise you you will be best friends with the girls you live around and the girls who live closest to you, no matter what. So when you're choosing your sorority, do it based off the girls you like, truly respect and want to model yourself after and have the same values as you, because if you're worried about going what I have to go, what my roommate goes, or I have to go with what the girls across the hall go, you're going to be best friends with everyone who lives around you, no matter what Right right, which is a good thing to keep in mind.

Speaker 1: 26:15

So we all know that UT is a very popular school in the Park Cities. A lot of people want to go there. Not everyone gets in the traditional way. A lot of people go the route of ACC Austin Community College and I know that's a completely different experience for those girls that do that.

Speaker 1: 26:30

Just so you guys know, boys can pledge fraternities, girls cannot pledge sororities until they are officially into UT which I have got to figure out why that is the case, and I'm going to get to the bottom of that. But, chloe, tell me what you know about the girls that are doing the ACC route as far as.

Speaker 2: 26:45

Rush goes, absolutely so for the girls going ACC some of my best friends with the ACC route, and just do not fret Like for one my advice would be to appeal as many times as possible. This summer my suite mate actually got into Texas the day before Rush started.

Speaker 1: 27:02

When you told me that that gave me so much anxiety. Can you imagine? No.

Speaker 2: 27:06

But every girl was like, became like her superhero, like we were like, okay, let's get you this dress and this dress and it all worked out. But anyways, for the girls who are in acc, do not worry for all of the. If you're scared about being left out, I would say erase that fear from your head, because all of your friends all not all of our date parties, like we, would invite acc girls as our date to come to our formals and semi-formals and um, and you still get like on the wall on your dorm, on your door going into your dorm.

Speaker 2: 27:37

It's a big thing at texas where you put your letters like on your door and we make like riverbat letters for our acc friends river riverbat is the mascot for acc it's honestly cuter because it's a cute little bat instead of a horse.

Speaker 1: 27:52

Oh, that's hilarious.

Speaker 2: 27:52

But yeah, do not fret at all. And also, if you're rushing as a sophomore, sororities have a certain amount of allotted slots for sophomores, so do not stress about that either.

Speaker 1: 28:02

Yeah, I think many years ago that wasn't the case, but now it's kind of changed and I think that's wonderful because not everyone can go through freshman year.

Speaker 1: 28:10

Well, good, yeah, thank you for sharing all this information. It's so great and, again, she has put together a really amazing blog that I will post a link in the show notes and you guys can take a look at, and be sure and share this episode with your friends and anyone who can benefit from this information, because Chloe has shared a lot of wonderful insights, information that we're all not privy to and now we are. So thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for having me. That's been another episode of the Bubble Lounge. I'm Martha Jackson and we'll catch you next time.